Ralph Gardner Jr.
Articles by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Her Thieving Junkie Brother’s Memoir of Veronica the Great
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
May. 1st, 2007, 3:50 pm
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May. 1st, 2007, 3:50 pm
Several of New Yorker satirist and editor Veronica Geng’s friends—among them Philip Roth, Jamaica Kincaid and Roy Blount Jr.—were sitting around in an Italian restaurant after her wake in 1997 when someone asked Geng’s younger brother Steve where she got her brilliant sense of humor. read more »
It's the Turkey Parade! We Have C.P.W. Seats, But Will Stars Wave?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
We celebrate the holiday shopping season slightly differently at our house. read more »
It’s the Turkey Parade! We Have C.P.W. Seats, But Will Stars Wave?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
We celebrate the holiday shopping season slightly differently at our house. read more »
Strawberry Fields-Forever? Potholed Plot Jolts My Mom!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Aug. 6th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Aug. 6th, 2006, 8:00 pm
As I’ve been waiting for the right occasion to call 311, the Mayor’s complaint hotline, and it c read more »
Strawberry Fields—Forever? Potholed Plot Jolts My Mom!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Aug. 6th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Aug. 6th, 2006, 8:00 pm
As I’ve been waiting for the right occasion to call 311, the Mayor’s complaint hotline, read more »
Don't Change the Channel! When Alone at a Bar, That Is
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Apr. 9th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Apr. 9th, 2006, 8:00 pm
There are some risks attached to changing the TV channel at your local bar—not all of them involvi read more »
Don’t Change the Channel! When Alone at a Bar, That Is
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Apr. 9th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Apr. 9th, 2006, 8:00 pm
There are some risks attached to changing the TV channel at your local bar—not all of them inv read more »
My Crumb Collection Goes to Vassar- But Is It Art?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Apr. 2nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Apr. 2nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
Considering all the trouble cartoons have caused in the world lately, it was with some trepidation t read more »
My Crumb Collection Goes to Vassar— But Is It Art?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Apr. 2nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Apr. 2nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
Considering all the trouble cartoons have caused in the world lately, it was with some trepidation t read more »
Hillary's Would-Be Assassin Tries Bank Robbery Instead
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
Some people excel at journalism or poetry but strike out when they try their hand at fiction. read more »
Hillary’s Would-Be Assassin Tries Bank Robbery Instead
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 26th, 2006, 8:00 pm
Some people excel at journalism or poetry but strike out when they try their hand at fiction. read more »
Not the Watergate Break-In, But a Plumber All the Same
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 19th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 19th, 2006, 8:00 pm
It’s bad enough when workmen enter your apartment, don’t fix your problem and leave behind a mes read more »
Not the Watergate Break-In, But a Plumber All the Same
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 19th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 19th, 2006, 8:00 pm
It’s bad enough when workmen enter your apartment, don’t fix your problem and leave behi read more »
It's Always the Broken Headlight: Dotty Pothead Nabbed on Road
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 12th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 12th, 2006, 8:00 pm
One mistake crooks frequently make is that they attract unnecessary attention to themselves. read more »
It’s Always the Broken Headlight: Dotty Pothead Nabbed on Road
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 12th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 12th, 2006, 8:00 pm
One mistake crooks frequently make is that they attract unnecessary attention to themselves. read more »
Freedom is Confusing For Artistic Foreigners
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 5th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 5th, 2006, 8:00 pm
If you’ve ever visited a former Communist republic, you know that graffiti can be a problem. read more »
Freedom is Confusing For Artistic Foreigners
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Feb. 5th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Feb. 5th, 2006, 8:00 pm
If you’ve ever visited a former Communist republic, you know that graffiti can be a problem. read more »
Likeable Homeless Perps Get Expensive Sympathy Uptown
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 29th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 29th, 2006, 8:00 pm
You know those pain-in-the-ass (literally) counter stools they have at places like Starbucks and you read more »
Likeable Homeless Perps Get Expensive Sympathy Uptown
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 29th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 29th, 2006, 8:00 pm
You know those pain-in-the-ass (literally) counter stools they have at places like Starbucks and you read more »
Bags Stuck in Subway Doors Vulnerable to Platform Pirates!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 22nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 22nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
The New York City subway system isn’t for sissies, as a Jan. 3 incident proved. read more »
Bags Stuck in Subway Doors Vulnerable to Platform Pirates!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 22nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 22nd, 2006, 8:00 pm
The New York City subway system isn’t for sissies, as a Jan. 3 incident proved. read more »
The Revolution Begins— On the Upper East Side!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 15th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 15th, 2006, 8:00 pm
Chalk one up for the evildoers: A man told the police that he was walking past 203 East 89th Street read more »
The Revolution Begins- On the Upper East Side!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 15th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 15th, 2006, 8:00 pm
Chalk one up for the evildoers: A man told the police that he was walking past 203 East 89th Street read more »
Toxic Substance at Sotheby's! House HazMat Team Cleans Up
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 8th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 8th, 2006, 8:00 pm
The high-end auction-house business is considered among the more genteel of professions. read more »
Toxic Substance at Sotheby’s! House HazMat Team Cleans Up
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jan. 8th, 2006, 8:00 pm
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Jan. 8th, 2006, 8:00 pm
The high-end auction-house business is considered among the more genteel of professions. read more »
Toxic Substance at Sotheby's! House HazMat Team Cleans Up
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Dec. 18th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Dec. 18th, 2005, 8:00 pm
The high-end auction-house business is considered among the more genteel of professions. read more »
Toxic Substance at Sotheby’s! House HazMat Team Cleans Up
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Dec. 18th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Dec. 18th, 2005, 8:00 pm
The high-end auction-house business is considered among the more genteel of professions. read more »
The Barney's Briber! $700 Not Tempting to Cop
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Dec. 11th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Dec. 11th, 2005, 8:00 pm
While we’re not in the business of coaching crooks on how to become smarter criminals, it would se read more »
The Barney’s Briber! $700 Not Tempting to Cop
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Dec. 11th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Dec. 11th, 2005, 8:00 pm
While we’re not in the business of coaching crooks on how to become smarter criminals, it woul read more »
Loony for Lingerie on UES: Padded Bras 'Very Sexy'-and Hot
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Dec. 4th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Dec. 4th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Victoria’s Secret’s “Very Sexy” bra collection is flying off the shelves. read more »
Loony for Lingerie on UES: Padded Bras ‘Very Sexy’—and Hot
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Dec. 4th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Dec. 4th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Victoria’s Secret’s “Very Sexy” bra collection is flying off the shelves. read more »
Hey, St. Jude-Take That! Crazy Man Attacks Saint
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 27th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 27th, 2005, 8:00 pm
New Yorkers are a creative bunch, perhaps never more so than in the impromptu genius they display at read more »
Hey, St. Jude—Take That! Crazy Man Attacks Saint
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 27th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 27th, 2005, 8:00 pm
New Yorkers are a creative bunch, perhaps never more so than in the impromptu genius they display at read more »
Alcohol and Women Don't Mix: Girl-Beater Runs Over Cops
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 20th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 20th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Domestic violence is an unfortunately common occurrence; so are bar fights. read more »
Alcohol and Women Don’t Mix: Girl-Beater Runs Over Cops
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 20th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 20th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Domestic violence is an unfortunately common occurrence; so are bar fights. read more »
Las Vegas on 61st Street: Is Gambling OK on Upper East?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 13th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 13th, 2005, 8:00 pm
New Yorkers will forgive each other almost anything, but the one thing they won’t forgive is h read more »
Las Vegas on 61st Street: Is Gambling OK on Upper East?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 13th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 13th, 2005, 8:00 pm
New Yorkers will forgive each other almost anything, but the one thing they won’t forgive is havin read more »
He Said/He Said of Road Rage: Don't Flip the Bird!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 6th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 6th, 2005, 8:00 pm
No two people see the world exactly the same. read more »
He Said/He Said of Road Rage: Don’t Flip the Bird!
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Nov. 6th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Nov. 6th, 2005, 8:00 pm
No two people see the world exactly the same. read more »
Those Wily Veterinarians! They'll Catch You Every Time
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Oct. 16th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Oct. 16th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Hospitals are hotbeds not just of disease but also of crime. read more »
Those Wily Veterinarians! They’ll Catch You Every Time
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Oct. 16th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Oct. 16th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Hospitals are hotbeds not just of disease but also of crime. read more »
Women Can Be Muggers, Too! All It Takes Is Confidence
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Oct. 9th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Oct. 9th, 2005, 8:00 pm
It’s not news that women are every bit as capable, if not more so, than men. read more »
Women Can Be Muggers, Too! All It Takes Is Confidence
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Oct. 9th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Oct. 9th, 2005, 8:00 pm
It’s not news that women are every bit as capable, if not more so, than men. read more »
Do You Trust Your Super? What About His Friends?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Sep. 25th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Sep. 25th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Urban living presents many dilemmas, and one of them—perhaps not quite the most acute, but signifi read more »
Do You Trust Your Super? What About His Friends?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Sep. 25th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Sep. 25th, 2005, 8:00 pm
Urban living presents many dilemmas, and one of them—perhaps not quite the most acute, but sig read more »
Lots of Cooks in the Kitchen: Violence Erupts Uptown
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Aug. 21st, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Aug. 21st, 2005, 8:00 pm
One likes to think of Asian restaurants as oases of almost Zen-like calm amid the sharp-elbowed caco read more »
It's Trouble When “Al” Shows Up; Woozy Crook Loves Magazines
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Aug. 14th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Aug. 14th, 2005, 8:00 pm
In the same way that the New York City Department of Health produces an annual list of the most popu read more »
It's Trouble When "Al" Shows Up; Woozy Crook Loves Magazines
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Aug. 14th, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Aug. 14th, 2005, 8:00 pm
In the same way that the New York City Department of Health produces an annual list of the most popu read more »
People Who Talk During Movies: Shouldn't They Be Banned?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jul. 31st, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Jul. 31st, 2005, 8:00 pm
When faced, at the movies, with obnoxious fellow audience members who are talking or kicking the bac read more »
People Who Talk During Movies: Shouldn't They Be Banned?
by Ralph Gardner Jr.
Jul. 31st, 2005, 8:00 pm
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Jul. 31st, 2005, 8:00 pm
When faced, at the movies, with obnoxious fellow audience members who are talking or kicking the bac read more »
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